Viva El Paraguay or Give Me Back My Wine Key

We arrived in Paraguay yesterday and the last 24 hours have been more than I could have hoped for. Seth lives in a presidential palace compared to what we are used to on this trip. Actually, it’s a presidential palace compared to what I’m used to after living in Hawaii for 4 years. We now have air conditioning, a real kitchen, a nice house, a swimming pool and all of the amenities I had come to take for granted in the US. We can even flush the toilet paper down the drain here. The bed doesn't slope in the middle or have a spring sticking into our backs. And the shower has a steady stream of water that stays the same temperature throughtout the whole shower. On top of all of this, we get chauffeured around by someone who already knows all of the places to go. Thank you, Seth.

I plan to spend a good portion of my time here doing as little as possible beyond the scope of lying in the hammock by the pool and trying to avoid contracting dengue fever. There have been recent reports in Asuncion of some people contracting this disease, which I’ve heard causes the people who survive it to wish they hadn’t. I’m sure worrying about this is as unnecessary as worrying about contracting West Nile disease in the States. It happens, but the odds are slim. Besides, it’s probably too hot here even for the bugs to work in the daytime. And that is precisely when I will be letting my guard down as I lie by the pool inside the fortified compound that is Seth’s estate.

I’ll also be practicing my Spanish as much as I can. The two weeks of Spanish school definitely helped, but obviously I have a long way to go. I am able to talk to other people and somewhat get my point across, but their reply may as well be in Chinese, or any other language besides English for that matter. When people speak to me in Spanish they almost always receive the standard response of ‘Qué?’ or ‘como?’ Now, if they don’t know me yet, they might think that I didn’t hear them and repeat their question, statement, exclamation or command. This in turn, will result in my reply of qué or como, or possibly no entiendo, if I have given up. By now they have noticed my pale skin, blue eyes, American clothes and accent and have likely figured out that there is no point in attempting further communication with me. They will either use their best judgment and make a decision, or bring in someone else that speaks English. The latter is usually not an available option. This can achieve varying results ranging from angry customers waiting in line behind me to receiving something not quite resembling the item I had tried to ask for to both parties shrugging their shoulders and walking away without a clear resolution.

I don’t know if I will ever be able to understand anyone else speaking Spanish, but hopefully I can learn enough to say what I need to completely enough that there will be no need for questions from the second party. If not, I can always point at what I want until I get it and plead ignorance when I do something wrong. This usually works except at the airport (my wine key was confiscated going through security in Santiago). It was made out of plastic and more harmless than the ball point pen in my bag or the lighter that they didn’t seem to care about, but no amount of ‘no entiendos’ or puzzled looks on my part could save my wine key.